Recently while traveling in Zimbabwe, Africa during their winter season, our travel group spotted this beast as he approached our jungle vehicle. My heart flipped a bit. Would this approximately 2,500 pound creature continue to march toward us, or would we frighten him into altering his path? Would he be a friend, foe, or maybe just a neutral blob?
Predicting the path and focus of this giant animal is virtually impossible for the average tourist. Fortunately a skilled guide was in charge and the traveling team safely stared in awe. These guys with their pointed lip and wrinkled skin allegedly are short-tempered and ready to charge if danger seems to be apparent.
Although this traveler was thrilled to see an approaching rhino up close, there was absolutely no desire to take him home for a friendly pet. On a scale of 1-5, with five being a great future friend, this guy was a negative three. Reflecting on this photo after arriving back in Illinois, I thought about the concept of friendship. Why do we consider some people friends and others more rhino like — ok to be near and perhaps even exchange greetings, but no, never-ever would you want them for a close friend. The chance of danger was too great.
My thoughts continued down the friendship path, attempting to define a true friendship relationship. What actions does a REAL friend exhibit that results in another individual calling you a ‘true friend’? Four ideas seemed to float to the surface of my brain.
Real Friends . . . (Whether a long time or a newbie), friends do the following four things. They . . .
- (R)each Out in love. Jonathan, the son of King Saul, reached out to David, a solider in Saul’s military. The scriptures tell us in I Samuel 18:1 that, “After David had finished talking with Saul, Jonathan became one in spirit with David, and he loved him as himself.” When the King became angry with David, Jonathan helped provide for David’s safety. Friends need friends when the going is tough. Perhaps you can recall a time when you extended your actions to help a friend safely through a crisis he or she was facing. Friends reach out.
- (E)ncourage others with offers of practical help. They may hold the hands of grieving friends, care for a sick child thus allowing parents to continue working, or activate their hidden talent to rescue a friend from loneliness, hunger, or other temporary challenges. Friends use their talents to help others.
- (A)ctually Show Up during hard times as well as good. It’s great fun to join a friend for a dinner, spend a day at the lake or climbing mountains, or even sit and knit and chat together. But real friends eagerly and willingly also show up in times of crisis. They quickly adapt their own schedule and leap to bring in food, babysit, or schlep them to emergency care, even when weather is icy or temps are 100 degrees in the shade. Friends show up when there is a need.
- (L)ift up others spiritually is the toughest task for many friendships. Friends, however, pray for and with hurting individuals. Scriptures sometimes are an avenue to helping a friend relax. Often simple being present, sitting quietly providing a listening ear. Certainly we know that our friend Jesus provides that listening ear, as he sees and hears all of our pains and worries. Friends share that knowledge through words and examples with friends.
Then my thoughts went to the greatest friend possible — The Lord. He reaches out in love to all. His words found in the scripture encourage the reader as they understand He hears all and cares for each of His children. He shows up even when life is rough and all appears to be darkness. And of course, He is our spiritual guide and example.
Take Time to Reflect
Think
When is the Last Time You Helped REAL Friends With Each of These Four Actions?
Kathryn Ransom 